« May 2007 | Main | July 2007 »
Despite the fact that Keelin absolutely abhors anyone trying to comb, brush, wrangle or otherwise touch her hair, she sat almost completely still one night so I could set her hair in sponge curlers. She even slept with them in, which made waking up the next morning and pulling them out oodles of fun. Click here for more photos.
"Keelin! Come in here! I'm hiding from Darth Vadar."
"Dawk Vadaw!"
"Not Dark Vadar - it's Darth Vadar."
"Dawk Vadar!"
"I used to think it was Dark Vadar, but now I know its Darth - thu -thu Vadar. But he is very dark."
"Vewy Dawk."
An leaves for Vietnam tomorrow. She and I just finished a grueling but invigorating week leading a first grade class through vacation bible school.
As glorious as our recent role-reversal has been, Patrick and I are still trying to figure out how all the bills will get paid, and adding to that the possibility of the additional considerable expense that comes with our realization that private school may be the best fit for Logan next year.
Kiki is on the verge of turning three, although some days, it seems more like fifteen.
Charlotte/Frances/Megan/Lucy/Sophia continues to kick and squirm more tumultuously each day (though none of her pokes and prods give me any indication as to which of the aforementioned name possibilities she prefers - feel free to cast your votes through comments as I am taking all the naming help I can get at this point).
In sum, I am feeling stronger yet more challenged than I have in a long, long time - possibly ever. I have never wanted to give and do so much for my children--more than I feel I know how to do, and yet, I cannot quite believe that I am bearing as much of this glorious cross I have been given as I have so far.
I spent much of last night pondering and woke this morning thinking Why? Why all of this at the same time? Isn't the challenge of just raising our own two children enough? Will I really have what it takes to bring a third precious child into this mix without detracting from what I have to give to the others? Can I possible give An even the tiniest bit of insight to get her through what she must go through this summer and help her to return next fall?
How would I feel if I were being called upon to do less? This is certainly not an area in which I'd want to underachieve. At the risk of sounding like a completely unworthy martyr, I'll share the thought that came to me this morning -- the penultimate scene of the move Schindler's List.
Schindler saves hundreds of Jews from death during the holocaust, and yet, when it's all over and he looks back on what he's done, all he can think of is why didn't he do more? Why wasn't he able to save more people? It certainly was not for want of effort - I won't re-tell the story, but through the tale of this one man who put more than his own life on the line to save others, I realize when you are called upon to do something for the most valuable reason there is, you can't help but yearn to have done more when you finally get to the point of laying down that cross.
I have always been somewhat of an over-achiever (or at least an over-attempter), and my children mean more than anything to me. I've known since we first thought of having another baby that I did not want to get to the end of my child-raising years and wonder if we could have had a third. I also accept that, while I may have doubts in my own abilities, I know I would not be called on to do a job where children are concerned if the Big Boss didn't feel I could handle it. Now, it's just a matter of convincing myself.
Alternate Title: She Who Knows Absolutely Nothing About the World of Sports Broadcasting Should Not Attempt Such a Parody . . .
G'day sports fans. In a re-cap of today's ongoing championship season of the SAHM tournament of life, we saw a rough match between Mommy and the terrible two-some tag-team of Logan and Kiki.
Mommy, already quite exhausted from her three-hour morning Vacation Bible School exhibition games, in which she led a team of four (two moms and two teen helpers) against 15 first-graders, followed by a transitionless rotation to performing 3 hours of legal research, started off today's match as quite the underdog.
Logan and Kiki, bursting with energy from an afternoon at the sitter's, hit her straight on with a walk down the block for a pool date combined with two-on-one tandem tantrums over bathing suits and shoes. After an hour or so of challenging recreational maneuvers, Mommy managed to pull off a tricky distraction technique to get the two tots out of the pool and back home.
But, Team L & K raged back after dinner. Mommy was forced to retreat into a corner of the kitchen and resorted to the ultimate defense move: one more showing of the Roley-Poley-Olie video. She came back fighting after a few short episodes and took the terrible twosome up to the bath time challenge.
In the tub, it seemed as though all was lost for Mommy. The L/K team engaged in manipulative splashing, toy bickering and unspecified screaming. Mommy appeared to scrape together whatever energy she had left and and attempted a firm attack for the final wash-down.
Logan shot back with verbal punches, promptly echoed by Kiki:
"You're fired!"
"You're the worst Mommy in the World!"
"You're Nobody's Mommy!!!" (To which Mommy retorted under her breath, "That can be arranged . . ")
Then, they hit her with the ultimate insult -
"You're not a Mommy - You're a Grandma! I'm turning you into a Grandma!"
It was that move, which should have leveled Mommy flat, that turned the game around. Without missing a drip, Mommy turned into a feeble Granny parody that had Logan and Keelin giggling so hard, she managed to do a quick head-to-toe washing and even scored bonus points with a tearless hair rinse. With her confidence restored, Mommy held her lead for the remainder of the period, which ended soon after with the much-awaited sound of Daddy's car in the driveway.
Fasten your seat belts, kiddies. I'm about to delve into the irresistible and captivating realm of Blogging About Domesticity. A few nights ago, after the kiddies were tucked in their beds, I euphorically engaged in a stain-fighting excursion with a new bottle of Oxyclean. I salvaged several maternity tops and, all those stains on my carpet? Nana - you know the ones - on the bottom stair and at the top of the landing? Gone. It was all I could do to not post about my epiphany-like experience.
Today, in a move that may truly result in Patrick serving me with divorce papers, I crossed over to the dark side: I went shopping at WalMart. (Patrick will groan audibly when he reads this.) Aside from a very few, purpose-driven excursions into the Evil Monopolistic Retail Pit of Hell, today was the first time I went in, strapped Keelin in the cart, and let myself explore.
The aisles were neat, organized and well-stocked. I noted the availability of organic produce and recyclable products. I also noted the lure of deliberate marketing techniques designed to get me to pile up on unnecessary items for no reason. Shreck must sill be the number-one spokes model, and the irresistible-to-Kiki Disney Princesses smiled on everything from sunscreen to cereal. Still, we managed to leave the store remarkable unscathed, and with me feeling somewhat victorious over finding Chinette plates that are both sturdy and recyclable - these can even be composted! And you can't beat the low, low prices.
On second though, maybe it will only take a few more trips before I'm due for a WalMart Exorcism or some other type of intervention.
Wow. I'm posting this mainly to quell any fears those of you who read this might have that I'm curled up in a ball in the back of my closet while Logan and Keelin play with Patrick's power tools. The real reasons I haven't posted are 1) not surprisingly, the SAHM lifestyle affords me far fewer opportunities to log on then when I was Working for the Man; and 2) things are actually going so well that I'm afraid to write about it for fear I might jinx myself. So, instead, I'll just post a few photos on flickr, and leave it at this: if I don't post for a while, it's just because I'm relishing in not being nauseated and out giving it all I can for the kiddies at school/camp/church while I can.
Recent Comments