Fannee Doolee

Morning Ride

Alternate title:  When all else fails, post some poem I wrote during my college years/circa 1993:

Oh, the joys of being self-propelled! Cause and effect, pedals pumping, I am so aware of my force against the ground. Voices and cars fade as I tune to the frequency of my inner machines.

Cause and effect, and some sense of control as I weave past obstacles. Avoiding cars as I cut across roads, choosing my path hastily as I approach every corner. Still feeling the air moving in and around me.

A horn protests, a curb approaches too fast! I am suddenly reminded of my connection to the ground. Sweat and spit and a few tears (from the wind) are wiped away, along with tiny, smattered bug corpses from my forehead. The wind beacons, my bike rights itself, and I ride on.

Cause and effect, air still moving in and around me, I see houses, dogs, cars, children, my own legs as they pump up and down. Passing images turn to thoughts:

A dead squirrel—a baby crying

Tires spinning—a Ferris wheel

A playground—skinned knees

Being lost and alone, awakening at night from a bad dream and being unable to scream.

And birds—I am instantly aware only of their song. From everywhere they cry, calling and whistling. I become propelled by their rising chorus.

And death, to you I say, let me be for a while yet. I do not fear you—your close company keeps me awake.

And life, to you I say, let me be lost in you completely. Surrounded by all that is and is not, I am kept warm.

For life and death, these two being the only real companions anyone can really have.

For we are all in the same company of our utter loneliness

Of our separation by words and languages

Of our distancing from our child-mind

Of our moving into and away from grace.

For life and death, these two being one, and I being all and nothing in the blinking eye of the morning sun.

Holiday Haiku

Last night, I had the pleasure of attending An's high school Christmas program.  Oh, how the memories came rushing back - the costumes, the rehearsals, the chaos.  Last night's show was quite an impressive undertaking.  There were at least six different vocal ensembles, two symphonic bands, two jazz bands, several smaller instrumental groups, a steel drum ensemble and an appearance by the Grinch.  An sang with the Women's ensemble - I could not have been any prouder if she had been my own child. 

An's concert inspired me to compose some holiday haikus.  See if you can guess the Christmas songs that inspired these:

#1

Hall out the holly!

We need a little Christmas!

Maybe I'm rushing?

#2

When I'm feeling sad,

then, I remember raindrops.

I don't feel so bad.

#3

I've been a good girl.

There's something I really need--

A platinum mine!

The answers may or may not be revealed in the following clips:

Or in these photos.   

Little Poet

Tonight, Logan and Keelin helped me bake a sweet potato bundt cake, which in less than a years' time has become my culinary masterpiece.  As I was cleaning up, I gave Logan a handful of raisins.  Before eating them, he lined them up and counted them.  Then, he recited this poem:

Nineteen raisins,
I ate them all up.
Now, one more
for good luck!

He was so proud of this little couplet that I had to give him the extra raisin. 

Haiku

Last night, I took An to her first professional theatrical performance in America - the national tour of Twelve Angry Men starring Richard Thomas ("Goodnight, John boy!") and George Wendt ("Hey Sammy, how 'bout another beer?"), which was followed by a short lecture on the jury system by some local attorneys and a federal judge. 

Before the show, Patrick and I took An out to dinner at a sushi restaurant called Haiku.  An had never tried sushi before, so we ordered a sampling of nigiri sushi and rolled sushi, which she ate like a pro and demonstrated a high tolerance for wasabi.

Every table at Haiku comes equipped with scraps of paper and pencils so diners can compose haiku poems while waiting for their meals.  Here are the three that Patrick, An and I wrote last night.  See if you can guess who wrote which:

Haiku #1

Looking at the sky

The sun that shines above you

Makes the blue birds sing

*

Haiku #2

green is the clover

the ocean of green below

caressing my feet

*

Haiku #3

Hey buddy – Watch it!

You almost ran me over.

Quit honking your horn!

Reminders

Please don't ever let me forget . . .

The way Kiki rubs Floppy Dog's ear against the toes on her left foot before she falls asleep

What Logan said to me after we finished watching The Little Princess

How committed to each other Patrick and I are at this moment

How thankful I am just to be where I am and to have what I have

Realizations

From shoulders to rump, Keelin is exactly the size of a loaf of bread.

Logan gets sick to his stomach the same way that I do:  an elongated period of belabored moaning, humming and screaming; followed by a moderate period of complete silence; followed by a brief period of rapid expulsion.

Sometimes, anticipating eating ice cream is better than actually eating ice cream (but not always). 

The music of birds singing is unmatched.

Reminders

Please don't ever let me forget:

How warm and sweet my children smell when they're asleep

How tiny Keelin's toes are

How enormous Logan's emotions are

How wonderful it is to have a husband who can make me laugh, even when I'm exhausted--especially when I'm exhausted.